Let's see how my seven day challenge went. :D 

First food thing in my list was a cake, which I had at work and at home the next day. And it was absolutely delicious. It was better than the one I made at my parents'. Maybe it was a good change that I used pears instead of apples. Anyway, others at work really liked it was well and it was finished before the day ended. :) The next day my sister's friend came over and they ordered sushi (I didn't join them in the end), and tried the cake too. They both loved it. Also, the most adorable thing was that my co-worker sent me a mail to say that it was absolutely delicious and added that I should make it another time as well. I will remember. :D

Next thing was pasta, which I think was the scariest thing in the list. I still don't know why... probably because I haven't had it in a while and haven't made anything with noodles recently. Anyway I made pasta with mushrooms, tomatoes, garlic, zucchini and topped it off with feta cheese. I got this habit of adding feta from a friend who we were in Oslo together and cooked at airbnb. It goes really well! And pasta is super good. The portion seemed huge, even though I added less pasta than the recommended amount, even. :D I don't know if this makes any sense. But yeah, usually when I make pasta, I make it enough for the whole town. :D But this gave me a good reassurance that I can have pasta and more than I think. Also at one point I even thought about this pasta-vegetable thing I had at the hospital in Tartu and thought that it was pretty normal food. Anyway, yes, time to make more pastas!

Also in my list there were liquid calories. I think I want to challenge this more often. So, on Friday before we had dinner, me and my sister enjoyed a glass of wine and some cheese. This was of course extra for me and it was quite difficult. It wasn't difficult to have it, but I had a lot of guilt later. But again, I thought that this was one time thing and it won't change anything in the grand scheme of things. I don't drink wine every day or have cheese every day, sometimes you are allowed to do this. Also food has such a huge social aspect in it. All kinds of meeting and hangouts usually are connected to food. And thus you should consider separate eating patterns - some for simply enery, some for socializing. And both of them are important. I don't want to be someone to say no to a snack for the rest of my life. I want to join in with people and do what others are doing.

Next was pizza, which we made at home. Again, I topped the pizza with mushrooms, bell peppers, tomatoes and a lot of cheese and herbs. It was diffiult too, but not as hard as pasta. And we had it right after it. But as I challenged pasta the previous day, the next difficult  thing - pizza - was not as difficult any more suddenly. So yeah, comparing it, it was much easier. Also it maybe helped that I had already had same kind of pizza another day. Also it was really cute that when I went to do the dishes, my sister said that "this was so good, but there is no more, what do we do now". :D In general I feel much better when someone compliments my cooking and the guilt kind of gets out of the way like this. It kind of takes the focus of off how much food I have had. :D

Then came cookies, to which a lot of people recommended different places for. But my holidays started and I didn't want to go to town, so I had something easier and just got Milka chocolate chip cookies. And I had THREE of those. At first I thought I would have one. Then I thought I will have two, but in the end I ate three. :D Besides, someone needs to eat them all, right. I need to remind myself sometimes that I am allowed to have as many as I want. I guess for me it would be advised to have the whole packet. Cookies are actually really good. Recently I have been having a lot of fresh things as snacks and it is kind of difficult to let this habit go. So this is a good challenge. Besides I really love chocolate!

I thought that jam will be easy. I mean, I add bananas, frozen fruits and berries to my oatmeal all the time, so I thought this will be no big deal. But in reality this was one of the most difficult things. Firstly my plan failed, as I couldn't open the jar. I picked my mum made blackcurrant ham. But on this day I was good and added cocoa powder and coconut flakes to my porridge instead. But on the next day I managed to open the jar and added some jam to my breakfast. It also was more difficult that instead of oatmeal I had rice porridge instead. I don't do it very often, thus it has become challenging. But somehow rice porridge goes with jam better in my head. I also added some pumpkin pie spice to it. And then it all started: I felt as if I added too much jam. It has a lot of sugar in it. I shouldn't have added banana on top of it. And so on and so on. And I thought about this the whole day. And felt guilty over it. Even during having dinner I felt guilty. But this exact thing makes me want to challenge myself again and have jam again tomorrow. I want to get over this silly fear. This week has proven to be so helpful. For example fries don't scare me at all anymore. Pizza is fine. Pasta is surprising. I think sweet things like jam, cake and liquid calories are the most difficult.

And finally, fries. I bought those frozen sweet potato fries and made the whole bag at once. And these were really good! Completely different from making your own from potatoes. They were soft and delicious and matched well with garlic ketchup and mayo. And honestly, it wasn't half as bad as I was afraid. Even after dinner I didn't feel guilty. Sometimes these challenges are so surprising - things that you think, are the most scared of, turn out to be completely fine.

Anyway, I am really pleased with this challenge. Actually, it would be nice to take another seven things - I am sure there are many more - and repeat this challenge. But now I will try to write down next 7 challenges for myself! And it won't be just food items, but more like situations I want to complete. Let's see.

1. Have rice several days in a row.

I don't know why, but I am only okay with having potatoes on several days in a row. It feels much safer. I don't know, I can't imagine having rixe or quinoa or pasta for several days. Only potatoes are fine like this. :D And I honestly don't know why that is. But I have made potatoes for many times now and I want to give myself a new challenge already.

2. Have a snack that is more than 200 calories.

Since they told us at the hospital that a snack has to be 200 to 300 calories, I have always maxed out on 200. This is kind of like a rule I have made for myself. Like when I have a chocolate bar that is 202 calories, in my head it is already too much. :D Makes no sense, I know. But it is what it is. So a good challenge.

3. Have peanuts or chips.

I mean, peanuts have as many calories as chocolate, considering the 100 grams. Maybe a bit more. But chocolate doesn't seem scary, while peanuts seem to be the worst thing in the world. My friend sent me honey and pepper roasted nuts, which I still haven't had... I guess it is time to try them out..

4. Have lunch or cake out.

I am not brave enough to do the both things, but I want to do one. I have been dreaming about going to a cafe or a restaurant and have daily offer. I have also thought how cool it would be to go out, have cafe latte and a piece of cake. I promised to my friend who works in a cafe that I will go and have something. So I got to do it.

5. Have days off gym.

Because at the moment it is very difficult. When I go to yoga class on one day, then I immediately feel that I NEED to go the next day as well. This is stupid. That is why it is good that my health has made me stay at home on some days. Like I haven been spending the whole 24 hours at home on some days, I have only been to a store to stock up on watermelon. :D And there are days in life when you can't go to the gym and work out. To not have guilty feelings, it is important to challenge myself like this. Also I thought that I will have a rhytm where I will go to gym 3 days per working week. I know this would help me go through difficult days at work. Because sometimes the only thing that saves me is the thought of "I get to go to yoga after work". A post about gym life is coming soon.

6. Go to sleep later.

This is completely random and I bet everyone are thinking like how is this connected to your eating disorder? I am surprised myself. I think I have talked about this previously as well, but in general is that on the evening I already start looking forward to breakfast. Instead of having something more. And then I go to sleep early to wake up and have breakfast??? Instead I should honor my hunger and have food if I want it.

7. Have a vegan day of eating.

I really want to make another vegan challenge, so this would be the first step towards it. I already have a lot of ideas and I guess I could make a separate post about it later too. Would it be interesting? It would show what I have in a day. :D Could be fun. But if I don't make a separate post, this would still be a good challenge!

Last week I set these three short-term goals as well, which I thought about going over briefly as well.

First I wanted to have proper three meals and snacks (at least). And I have done this. Yesterday was kind of difficult - I had lunch at one and snack at three, but I hadn't had my snack at 11. Instead of skipping it though, I had it around five. So I really managed this goal well this week. And I have done the same on other days. Besides if I skip something on one day, starting having it again is really tough.

My second goal was to literally only go to yoga classes, which I kind of kept at. On one day I went to pilates class instead of yoga. I just really wanted to do something. I really took it easy though, and if I was too tired to complete a move, I just lay down and waited. I think it is okay. But I will go to more yoga classes in the future. I am really glad that all the trainers have been so nice and classes have gone by really fast. But I will have a separate post about it,

And the next goals was to have less carbinated drinks, which I didn't succeed at. On one day I was completely good and only had water and tea. And the next day I had TERRIBLE headache. I don't know if it is because I am so used to Coca Cola and it has cafeine, but I kind of made this connection. So on the next day I gave up and had my drink. I really want to not have it as much. I tried drinking just carbonated water, but it is not it. I am annoyed with myself. And honestly, it does cost a lot if you see the amounts of soft drinks I have. :D I thought about having LESS every day, bur knowing me... I am always the one to cut things out completely, going cold turkey. Let's see if I am more successful in the future.

Anyway, this is that. Let's see how my next challenge goes!